- Sneezed
Alex’s hands gripped the warm coffee cup tightly. This cold had left a chill through him that wouldn’t go away. A sudden urge to sneeze surprised him and he didn’t have time to set the cup down. “Hehhh-CHUHHH, EHH-CHUHHH, Ehh-CHUushh.” He felt the hot coffee slosh onto his white shirt. He reached for the Kleenex, not sure whether to blow his nose first or blot at his soaked shirt.
Alyssa came into the kitchen and took a look at him, covered in coffee. “What happened?”
“I sneezed.”
- Fit
“Hihtschuhh.”
Freddie watched her sneeze, sniffle, sigh and go back to her notes, wiping her nose on a tissue.
“Ihhtschuhh.”
Repeat.
“Hihhtchiihshuhh.”
This time she slipped in a quick nose blow, although he knew that would do nothing to quell the sneezes. Once Jamie started, she was gonna sneeze until she was done.
“Hihhtchoo.”
She didn’t even get a chance to pick her pen back up between sneezes that time. Another nose blow, stronger this time.
“Ihhhtschoo.”
He crossed over to her end of the couch and took her Kleenex covered book from her, handing her a fresh tissue from the box next to her.
“Hey, take a break and ride the fit out ok. You’ll get more done when that’s done.”
- Cat
Tim looked over at Alex as the other man sniffled wetly three times before his jaw went slack and he muffled a powerful “Huhhhchuhh” in the crook of his elbow.
Tim looked down to see Missy rubbing up against Alex’s legs. He bent down and scooped her up.
“I swear, this one likes to see me sneeze.” Alex muttered.
“You’re being ridiculous.” Tim told him as Alex geared up to sneeze again.
“Uhhh-chuhh.” Missy perked her head up and stared at Alex.
“Or not. I’ll stick her in the bedroom.”
“Thangks” Alex sniffled. Tim got up, deposited Missy in the bedroom and returned with a box of tissues for Alex.
- Dog
*takes place after Not Just a Cold
Freddie lay on the bed with Jamie sitting next to him. “How you doing?” She asked.
“Starting to feel better.” He said with a sniffle. “I can’t believe I’m allergic to cats and you’re not.”
“It is pretty unbelievable,” she agreed. “Why’d you decide to get a cat now anyway?”
“Ehh-chushh.” He blew his nose carefully. “I wanted a pet, something like you have with Pace. I figured a cat would be the best for when I’m on the road – not to much work for you.”
She smiled and took his hand. “You can get a pet, baby. I don’t mind taking care of it when you travel with Alex.”
“So, I could get a dog? Uhh-chushh. Ugh, this is getting annoying.”
“Preaching to the choir.” She hesitated. “Pace is a breed bred for people with allergies. You could get one like him….” She said slowly.
“You’re allergic to dogs too.”
She nodded. “Pace is bred to be allergy friendly; he has a different type of coat that I don’t really react to. I think there’s other breeds we could try. But if you want a German shepherd or a golden retriever, I can’t do it.” She. Looked at him sadly.
He turned his head away. “Heh-chushhuh. I understand. After this week, I kinda get how you feel a lot now. Pace might be happier with a dog like him too.” He smiled, pulling out his phone. “Let’s find a puppy.”
- Allergic
”Hiitschoo.” Jamie sneezed and rubbed at her eyes. “Hihh–tschoo. Tschoo, Ihhtschoo.”
She flopped down on a chair and blew her nose before sneezing again.
Freddie heard her from the office and came out to check on her, grabbing Kleenex from the living room. “Ok?” She heard through another sneeze.
She waved him away. “Fide. “Ihhtschoo, hiihhtschoo. Hiihhh…ihtschoo.” She blew her nose again and grabbed for fresh tissues before another round hit her. “Hitschoo, itschoo, tschoo,schoo, hihh…ihshhoo….ihshhoo….hihhh…ihhshooo!” She leaned against the chair and alternated blowing her nose and catching her breath.
“Bless you.” Freddie rubbed her shoulders. “What set that off?”
“I’m allergic to something.” She sniffled into her tissues.
“I got that, but what?”
She just looked at him and shrugged.
- Spring
”Huhchuh.” Alex sneezed himself awake.
“Huh-chuhh.” Sneezed himself through breakfast.
“Huh-chuh, uhchuhh.” Sneezed himself through work
“HihhhChuhh.” Sneezed himself through dinner and the game on TV.
“Huhhihchuhh.” Sneezed himself to sleep.
Spring had sprung in Alex’s world.
- Camping
“How long do you think it will be before his allergies kick in?” Freddie asked Time regarding Alex. The three of them had decided to go camping. They had just set up the tent and were getting ready to start a fire to cook dinner.
Tim shrugged. “Another hour.”
Freddie nodded. “$20 says its at least 2.”
“You’re on.”
They had gotten the fire roaring and dinner on when Alex brought his arm up to his nose and sneezed. “huh-chuhh, uhhh-chuhh, huhhhchuhh.” He sniffled, rubbing his nose with his sleeve.
“Bless you.” Said Tim to Alex. “Told you.” He said to Freddie as Freddie slipped him a $20 bill.
Tim slipped away to the car. He handed Alex tissues and held up a bottle of allergy pills. “Take these today?”
Alex gave a sheepish grin. “Hehhh-chuhhh. Hand them over.”
- Fall
Freddie was running late for work and rushing through the house. He was halfway down the stairs when two forceful sneezes burst out of him without warning. “”HUHCHUSHH, HUHHCHUSHUHH.”
He lost his footing and slid down the remainder of the staircase.
Jamie, hearing the commotion, came out from the kitchen. “You ok?”
“Hehh–CHUHH. Yeah. Just sneezed and missed a step.” He said sheepishly.
She extended a hand and helped him up.
- Hay Fever
They were all hanging out in Alex’s pool, batting a ball around. It was a warm, sunshiny spring day with a strong breeze.
Tim hit the ball over to Alex, but instead of hitting it back, Alex turned and sneezed.
“Hihh-chuhh, uhh-chuhh, uhchuhh, chuhh, chuhh, Huhhhchuhh.”
“You ok, sweetie?” Alyssa asked.
Alex nodded, turning back to the group. “Yeah. Just h..ha…aaychoo. Hay fever.” He sniffled. He jumped out of the pool, dried off and ducked into the house in search of tissues.
- Sick
Her head was throbbing. Her throat was sore and felt as thought was being stabbed by steak knives. Her sinus were completely plugged up, and she had a harsh unrelenting cough. Her body ached from coughing and sneezing.
“Ihhschoo! Ihhshoo! Ihhtschoo! HihhSCHoo! SCHOO! HuhhihhSCHOO! Ihhschoo!” The sneezes exploded out of her, and she sat up, blowing her nose several times.
“Bless you.” She looked over at Alex, his face etched with concern.
“Ared’t you sigk of sayig thad?” She croaked
He shook his head. “Never.” He paused as she sneezed again.
“”Huhhrihhshoo!” This was followed by a coughing spell.
He rubbed her back and handed her her water when she finished. “More rest.”
She laid back down. “I cad’t rebeber the last tibe I was this sigk.”
- Cold
”Heyeshoo, ehhshoo.” Tim buried two sneezes in the crook of his arm and pulled his blankets tighter around himself. “Hayehhshoo, ehhshoo.” He sneezed again.
Sniffling, he came out of his blanket burrito to blow his nose. Shivering, he wrapped the blankets tight when he was done.
“Hayahhshoo, ahhshoo.” Two more sneezes muffled into his pillow. ‘Ugh, this cold,’ he grumbled to himself.
Shivering again, he extracted himself from his covers in search of another blanket. He knew warmth would make no impact on his head cold symptoms, but just maybe there was a chance that if he wasn’t freezing, he would stop sneezing.
- Fever
Alex kicked the blankets off. Too hot.
5 minutes later, he was shivering and wrapped them around them again.
10 minutes later, he was a hybrid of half in the blankets, half out.
Then blankets off.
Blankets on.
“You’re restless tonight.” Alyssa commented from next to him.
“Can’t get comfortable. Too hot. “Hey–chuhh. Too cold.”
“Do you have a fever?” She slipped out of bed and grabbed the thermometer from the bathroom, handing it to him.
He slipped it under his tongue. “101.” He read when it beeped.
- Dream
”Ihhschoo! Ihhhshoo! Hiiihhschoo!”
Freddie reached over and gently shook Jamie fully awake.
“Hiishoo, hiitschoo, ihtschoo…hiihhitshoo!” She reached for a tissue from the box by the bed and blew her nose.
“You were sneezing in your sleep.” He observed.
“I was sneezing in my dream. I was dreaming I was in a field of flowers and the only way out was to walk through it.
Freddie chuckled. “Sounds like a nightmare for you.”
- Tired
Freddie yawned widely. He could barely keep his eyes open. “I didn’t know Benadryl makes you this sleepy.” He mumbled drowsily. “It doesn’t do that to you.” He said to Jamie.
“I’m used to taking it.” She told him.
“”Huhchishh. It helps with the sneezing though.” He observed, yawning again.
“It does do that.”
“I am…” he trailed off. She looked over. He had fallen asleep mid sentence.
- Red
Freddie sat down at his desk and sneezed. “Huhhchishh, ehhchishh, chihhshoo.” He blew his nose several times.
“Bless you,” Alex said from behind him.
Freddie turned around and looked at his friend and, technically, boss, sniffling. “Hey,” he said thickly.
Alex took stock of Freddie’s red nose and eyes. “Cold no better?”
“Huhhhchushhuhh. Do.” He blew his nose again.
“I’m sending you home.”
Freddie blew his nose again. “I cand work.”
“You’ve sneezed 4 times in a minute, and I think you have pinkeye. Go home.”
- Handkerchief
“Ihhtshoo.” Jamie sneezed and reached for a tissue from the box next to the couch. Noticing it was almost empty, she got up and grabbed the last box from the storage closet.
She headed to the kitchen to put Kleenex on the shopping list. Freddie saw her write it on there. “Almost out again?” She nodded. “Do you think we’d save money if you used handkerchiefs?” He asked.
“I’m not doing that.” She told him. “First, do you know how much more laundry we’d have to do? Ihhtschuhh. And second, don’t you think it’s kinda gross to keep a cloth full of snot and germs in your pocket? It’ll contaminate everything you put in your pocket. Say I have a cold and stick my keys in there…do you want to touch my keys after that?”
He made a face. “Fair point.”
- Doctor
Alex sat in the waiting room, head throbbing and nose running. He pulled a tissue from his pocket and blew his nose, then resumed scrolling on his phone. He’d had this cold for 2 weeks and it wasn’t getting any better.
“Huh…CHUHH.” If anything, he was getting worse. At least, the sneezing was. Harsher and more powerful. His sinuses were completely plugged up, and he had a constant headache.
“Hehh–CHMMPHH.” He managed to catch that one in the tissue he held in his hand. He blew his nose again as his name was called.
20 minutes later, he’d seen the doctor, been diagnosed with a sinus infection and had a prescription to help him fight it.
- Flowers
”Ihhtschoo!” Jamie sneezed for at least the 20th time in the last hour, glaring at the plant on her desk. The board of directors had given it to her to show appreciation for her hard work in her first 6 months. They might have given her roadkill instead, she mused. At least then she might be able to get work done.
She wiped her watering, itchy eyes and turned back to her computer. She had found the place where she left off in her editing when she sneezed again. “Ihhtschoo! Ihhschoo!”
“Ihhshoo!”
“Huhh..ihhtschhoo!”
“Ihhschooo!”
Punctuated by nose blows, she was sneezing every couple minutes. A knock on her door startled her, and she motioned her boss in.
“You ok?” He asked.
She nodded, sniffling. “Allergies.” She gestured to the plant. He knew about her allergies – the whole building did.
He nodded. “Why don’t we put that in the conference room?” He suggested.
“Ihhtschoo.” She nodded. “I like that idea. Ihhtschuhh.”
“And, Jamie, go home. You’re not going to get any work done like this.”
She looked at him gratefully. “”Probably not.” She cringed at the congestion in her voice, but if he noticed, he didn’t comment. “Is there someone who can take you home? You probably shouldn’t drive like this.”
She nodded and looked at her watch. Freddie didn’t go into rehearsal for at least another hour. “Yeah, I can get a…aaiitschhoo…a ride. And thanks.”
“I’ll see you in the morning.”
- Soup
Alyssa always made her grandmother’s chicken soup when she was sick. This time she was too sick to make it, so Alex was in the kitchen, making it for her.
She was asleep on the couch when it finally cooled enough for her to eat. He ladled out a bowl and slipped into the living room. He debated not waking her up, but she’d barely been eating. Soup was what she needed, he decided.
“Lyss?” He gently shook her awake.
She opened her eyes and coughed. “Yeah?” She rasped.
“I made your grandma’s soup.”
“Dot hugry.” She closed her eyes.
“Need to eat.” He said firmly as she opened her eyes again. She sat up and he draped the blanket over her shoulders. He started to hand her the bowl.
“Hold od.” She warned him, turning her torso away from him. “Hahh—ihhshoo!, isshhoo! Shooo!”
He waited while she blew her nose. “Bless you. Ready?”
At her nod, he handed her the bowl again, and watched her start to eat. “You did a good job.” She said hoarsely.
- Sleep
Alex needed to sleep, Alyssa noted, looking at him. He was pale and his eyes were droopy. Between the show and road dates, this month had stretched him thin.
He picked at his dinner, denying anything was wrong with it, or him. “Just tired, is all.” He reassured her.
She was not reassured.
She was taking her contacts out when she heard him in the bedroom.
“Huhh…chuhh. Uhchuhh. Uhhhchuhhh. Huuuhchuhh…chushooo.”
“Bless you.” She said softly. “Allergies?”
He shook his head. “I, uh, think I’m getting a cold.”
She ducked into the bathroom and returned with the NyQuil. He was going to sleep well tonight.”
- Phone Call
Freddie answered his cell phone to hear a familiar sounding sneeze.
“Ihhtschooo. Sorry.”
“What’s up sweetie?”
“Cand you combe pick be up at work?”
“Umm, I should be able to? Is something wrong? You sound awful?”
“Ihhschooo! Ihhtschoo. I’m being sendt hombe sigk.”
“You’re sick?”
“It’s allergies. I’ll explaid everything ind the car. I’mb sndeezing too buch to worgk. HiiihhhtSCHOO!”
“I can hear that. Let me let Alex know I have to leave and I’ll be on my way.”
- Dust
Alex liked to visit his storage unit occasionally. The things that were most important were in his house, of course…but other things he had accumulated over the years were safely tucked away there.
He arrived at the unit and after about 8 attempts, found the right key.
He spent a couple hours there, going through boxes, smiling at the memories, picking out a few things he thought he might like around the house.
“Ehh-chuhhh. Ehhh-chuhhh.” The sneezing had started about an hour in.
With boxes and memories, there also came dust.
- Drive (continuation of phone call)
Freddie went up to Jamie’s office and got her, concerned about the state she’d be in.” She was sitting at her desk, holding tissues to her nose, trying to type a report with one hand.
She smiled when she saw him. “By dose will not stop rudding.” She informed him in a tight, stuffed up voice.
“What happened?” He shook his head. “Never mind. Let’s get you home. You can tell me in the car.”
“Ihhhsscchoo.” She blew her nose. “Okay.” They walked down to the car and began the drive home.
He took stock of her red runny nose and red puffy eyes as she leaned against the window. “What happened? You were fine this morning.”
“I dow.” She rubbed her forehead. “Hold on. Ihhhschooo…ihhhschooo..ihhh….ihhhschooo….ihhhhh…ihhhhhhhschooo. This is godda be gross. Sorry.” She apologized. She took the tissues and began blowing her nose a dozen times, sneezing four times in the process.
“Bless you. Do we need to go to urgent care?” He asked, concerned.
She blew her nose one final time. “Do. I’mb ok. Really.” She sniffled. “It’s allergies. They gabe me a plandt today at work.” She started voice still tight, but somewhat less congested. “I don’t know whad it was, but it had little purple flowers od it. And I had to take id ad pud id id by office.” She paused to blow her nose again. “Andyway, it took about 45 minutes to get to me. Ihhhtschoo. Ihhtschooo! I’ve been sdeezing ever sidce.”
She blew her nose again. “Pete suggested putting it in the conference room and sent me hombe. That’s when I called you. Except he forgot to take the plant and didn’t…Hiiiyishoo! Didn’t combe back, so I put it there.”
He nodded, hearing a slight wheeze in her breathing. “I think you need your inhaler.” He commented. She fished it out of her purse. “Why’d they give you a plant anyway?”
“Appreciation for productivity on the last few projects.”
“And then they have to send you home because of it.”
“Ihhtschhh…….yeah.”
- Responsibility
”Ehhhchuhh.” Alex sneezed into his pillow. He was tired with a headache that wouldn’t quit, made worse by his incessant sneezing. “Hhehhchahh.” He rolled onto his back and massaged his temples, wondering if it was time for more ibuprofen.
“Hehhchuhhh…ehhhchuhh, ihhhchuhh…chooo…heptchahh.” The sneezes shook him and made his stomach churn.
“Bless you, dad.” A soft voice came from the hallway. He opened his eyes to see Kristin standing there. “I’m hungry.”
He slowly sat up and blew his nose. Never mind the head cold and migraine, he had responsibilities.
- Alone
Tim dumped the can of soup into a bowl and stuck it in the microwave, scrubbing his nose with the back of his hand. He pulled his hoodie tight around him and coughed. He was going to have to run to the store for NyQuil and tissues after this. The downside of being single and halfway across the country from your family- there was no one to take care of you when you were sick.
The microwave beeped, and he reached to pull the soup out. He stopped suddenly and brought his shoulder to his nose. “Hehhshoo. Heyyehhshoo.” Sniffling he pulled the soup out and sat down at the table. He had taken a few bites of soup when his phone rang. Alex. “Hello.” He sniffed.
“Hey, wanna have dinner tonight?”
“I just made some soup.” He sniffled again and rubbed his nose. “And to be honest, I’m not really up for going out to dinner.” He coughed.
“You ok?”
“Woke up with a cold.”
“Sucks. Need anything?”
“Heyehhshoo. Ehhshooo. Really?”
“Bless. Really.”
“I have nothing. No cold medicine. Ran out of Kleenex. Just trying to convince myself to go out.”
“Stay put. I’ll bring some over. Food?”
“Orange juice? I have food.”
“I’ll be over in a bit. Bye.”
Tim coughed and blew his nose on a paper towel. Maybe he wasn’t so alone.
Aggedy Ann 