“AhtShoo!” Ethan sneezed for the second time since they had been seated for dinner, just following the ordering of the appetizer and drinks.
“Bless you. Allergic to the waitress?” Tim grinned.
Ethan looked down, shaking his head, smiling. “As you know, my allergies have been in overdrive all week. Rubbing a finger down the bridge of his nose, he set his tissue unobtrusively on the table.
“Sure you wanted to go out?”
“Sure you didn’t want to cook?”
“Sure you didn’t want to?”
“Sure you wanted to eat spaghetti on date night?”
“Point is yours, Mr. O’Connell.” Tim thanked the waitress as she returned with their drinks, requesting a few more minutes to order.
“Hey, I knew what I wanted.” Came Ethan’s protest.
“Really? Would’ve thought you were too busy sneezing to decide.”
“More like you’re too busy worrying about it.”
“Twice here, twice in the car on the way over…”
“Four. In the last hour.”
“You know it’s scary when you sneeze while driving…”
“And it’s downright terrifying when you do it.”
Tim opened his mouth to retort, then thought better of it. “Second point of the night to you as well.”
“As expehhh…Hatchoo!…expected. Excuse me.”
“This doesn’t bother you?” Tim made a small gesture to the crowded restaurant.
“What doesn’t?” Ethan intentionally played dumb.
“Sneezing like this…like this.” Again, he nodded to the crowded restaurant. Ethan knew he meant the volume and occasional frequency of his sneezing as well as the fact that Ethan was unfazed by it.
Ethan shrugged. “You get used to it, babe. I mean, I’m 40; we’re talking decades of this shit. You’ll get used to it too.”
Tim looked unconvinced. “I can’t get used to myself sneezing in a setting like this.”
“Because it’s weird for you if you sneeze more than twice a week. You don’t get to get used to it.”
“You raise a good point. Which means the third point is yours.”
“So what hahhh…Hahchoo!…what happens when I get all the points?”
“Bless you. Anything you want.”
“Considering how bad my allergies are right now, I should have you do the dusting and vacuuming tomorrow. I don’t know if I’m up for the pollen allergies and dust allergy combo.”
A brief look of horror crossed Tim’s face. “You wouldn’t.”
“Better to have the guy without the dust allergy do it, don’t you think?” He pause to wipe his nose and take a drink. “Unless there’s something you’ve been keeping from me.”
Tim shook his head. “No, it’s fine. Not allergic to dust. Just makes me sneeze a bit, remember.”
Ethan did remember. Tim’s “a bit” meant that Tim would spend most of the day sneezing, initially in a frenzy that seemed to fit the bill as allergic.
“Anytime you want to take over that task…” Ethan offered, only to notice Tim gently rub at his nose. “You ok?” He mouthed as the waitress came over and took their order.
“You ok?” He asked again when the appetizer had been dropped off and orders taken.
Tim nodded. “Nose is just a little itchy is all. Must be from all your sneezing.”
“Never bothered you before. Maybe it’s dusty in here.”
“Then you’d be sneezing.”
“I’m just going to go ahead and take that point. You can go ahead and think about if you’ll finally take my advice to cover your mouth and nose while dusting.”
“You can’t award yourself points!”
“You focus on how you’ll deal with all that tickly dust floating in the air. Getting in your eyes, making them itch. Making you sneeze those rough fits, 8, 10…didn’t you hit 14 once?”
Tim nodded, rubbing the heel of his hand in a circle against his nose.
“Hold on a sec. I’m making mysehhhh…AhChoo! Sorry, made myself sneeze.”
Tim’s face went blank for a full second before he had the presence to pull the collar of his polo shirt up over it. “Hhhhrrrruyyysscchooo! ruusschhehhhh!” He shook his head as if he wasn’t quite sure what happened, looking stunned.
“Bless you.” Ethan laughed, handing over a few tissues. I think I can award you a point for that.”
Aggedy Ann 